Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Does History Repeat Itself?
Lately I have been hearing my friends say that he or she has bad luck finding a loyal boyfriend/girlfriend. Being bitter and hurt, my friends tend to say that they "always get the short end of the stick" when it comes to relationships. I do believe that there is a special someone out there for everyone, but finding that special someone takes time and several tries. It is rare that a person finds their soul mate after his/her first try. There is a misconception when a person one is dating does not feel the same way you do, that history repeats itself and that person is once again been screwed over. History did not repeat itself for that person who got screwed over; rather that person has allowed him/herself to be hurt again. Sometimes a person just wants to be in a relationship so badly for find that special someone as soon as possible that he/she opens themselves too much too quickly while dating or in a relationship. On the other hand, if a person has been hurt too many times, that person will be reluctant to open themselves at all and that hinders a relationship as well. One may believe that history has repeated itself because he/she has allowed it to repeat. One needs to learn from his/her mistakes from a previous relationship and take that knowledge into the next relationship. Experience may help one in a new relationship but also knowing that each relationship is different. With each relationship a person takes in new experiences and knew knowledge on how to deal with not getting hurt. Every person who has dated around learns that history may seem to repeat itself, but each experience is different because each relationship is with a different and unique person.
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2 comments:
As a technical note, there is one part where your say "knew knowledge" and I think you meant "new knowledge." Anyway I believe you've taken on a sensitive but important subject for every person who dates, and you have taken command over your opinion. I agree with you opinion in that history doesn't really repeat itself in relationships instead we just get disappointed by rejection and hurt that it makes it seem repetitive. You bring up some great points and come to conclusion well.
You are right to suggest that difference is the only 'true' constant when it comes to relationships; even in a single relationship, every day is different, and the world changes (and we change) as we live in the world.
Here is an idea for your posts: try to write more than one paragraph. This may help you develop multiple points of entry into your subject. For instance, in this post, you could have explored the "history repeats itself" idea in one paragraph, and then in the second paragraph you could have countered this, and ended with an argument against repetition. Also, grounding this discussion in a single example (even if you fictionalized names) would have helped it seem a bit less abstract. Finally, work to think through cliché concepts like “soul mate”—this idea does not help people negotiate the truly complex terms of relationships, and it would help your post if you could bracket this term and say to your reader, “Let’s take this term seriously and see if it holds up.” Because you clearly show in your post that you know that life is more complicated that simply finding the ‘right’ person; rather, as you suggest, one must recycle knowledge and experience into the ‘new’ in order to develop in any relationship. Do you see what I mean?
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